Sex in Bucharest: Strip Clubs & Erotic Massage Parlours

So, you bought yourself a cheap ticket to Bucharest on EasyJet, and jumped on the plane thinking that all the fun and frolics available in Prague would be more or less on tap; whores lining the streets, as it were. Well, it isn‘t quite like that, but you can still get your end away: read on.

Bucharest is hardly Sex City, but with more brothels, massage parlours and sex shops per square inch than most places in Eastern Europe, you could be forgiven for thinking it was. You could also be forgiven for thinking that prostitution was legal: we can assure you of the fact that it certainly isn’t, despite any and all appearances.

This being Romania however, the law is more a minor obstacle to be overcome than a serious impediment, so you can indeed get away with sin, sin and more sin anytime you like, though discretion remains essential.

If you are looking for sins of the flesh, you basically have three options: one legal, one not exactly legal but not exactly illegal either, and one completely illegal.

The legal option is erotic massage at a reputable massage parlour. You will almost certainly not be offered any sexual encounters at these places, but there is still much fun to be had, from simple hand assistance to full body massage from one, two or even three nubile young ladies. Prices start at around €50 though climb higher at the more central, luxurious establishments.

The second (and not-so-legal) option is to simply head for a brothel (surely ‘erotic nightclub?‘ – Ed). These establishments advertise themselves in seedy publications as legitimate strip clubs, but act mainly as fronts for whorehouses, usually run by very dodgy, and often quite dangerous businessmen. After sitting yourself down at a table you will be served expensive drinks, before being joined by some very bored and not always attractive young ladies (most of Romania’s best-looking prostitutes are plying their trade in Germany and the Czech Republic). These girls sometimes lap dance for you, and always try to convince you to buy them ‘cocktails’ (in fact orange juice with an umbrella, usually costing about €15). After half an hour of bored conversation you will be asked if you would like to retreat to a more intimate location, usually a room above, or even in, the night club itself. For an hour of whatever it is you fancy expect to pay a minimum of €100, as well as the obligatory bottle of sparkling wine, which usually costs at least another €50. All this on top of the tab you have already run up of course.

The third (and entirely illegal option) is to call one of the escorts who advertise in many of the poor quality city guides found around town. These escorts are usually unattractive prostitutes who charge €150 upwards for sex. Bait and switch operations (you order an 18 year old with large breasts and you get a 48 year old with large everything) are commonplace, and you should really think twice before calling them.