Then you had kids...
While Papacino's has a great playground and you can't go wrong with Spur, you wouldn’t mind still feeling that Joburg vibe once in a while.
So here's some help. Thanks to our definitive guide to kiddie- and adult-friendly places and spaces, you'll keep your little ones happy, and your Jozi cool street cred.
Food
There are so many restaurant-goers with kids, but just too few child-friendly spots that serve up more than grown-up-sized frozen pizza, croissants that aren’t bread rolls, or something more exciting than a chicken mayo wrap. Restaurateurs: please consider this untapped market of hungry parents who just want something satisfying to eat. Despite this, we managed to find several wonderful exceptions:
Joy Jozi
This play-space is a winner. It boasts activities for every age group from toddlers and up, and has a menu designed by top chef Luke Dale Roberts. Set in a large heritage property next to Oxford Parks, on the Rosebank-Dunkeld border, it's a must-visit for sophisticates, young and old. The cocktails here are also top notch.
SetteBello at the Italian Club
Excellent Neapolitan pizza, beautifully cooked al dente pasta with crispy aubergines, a juicy burger that is perfectly pink in the middle, tender calamari in a subtle lemon sauce, and pistachio gelato (which may just be the best in town). The coffee is strong and good. Add a lovely playground, grass to run free on, and a lifeguard-manned pool for hot summer days. Cue: contented sigh for the whole family.
The Old Oak Restaurant & Family Centre
This meticulously designed spot has one of the best-looking playground's in Jozi (trust us: the kids won't want to leave it). The trampolines, bean bags, and log- and spider-swings means it's just too much fun – and you'll be tempted to try them out yourself! Sitting on the patio and enjoying a scrumptious breakfast may leave you wanting to stay for a glass of wine with lunch, while the kids make their own pizza...
The Fish & Chip Shop at Victoria Yards
Possibly the best fish and chips in Johannesburg is inside Victoria Yards. Fresh, flaky fish; slap chips with vinegar and crispy calamari. Kids love exploring the beautiful veggie gardens of Victoria Yards, swinging in the hanging chairs and getting a scoop from Sobae. You can also buy gorgeous local clothes, homeware and art.Cool outings
Sci-Bono Discovery Centre
This science museum is full of fantastic exhibits, a construction play area that will keep little ones occupied for hours and a science show that will amaze you too. You might even enjoy ditching your street cred and tapping into your inner nerd, because as the saying goes here, "There is nothing cooler than science".
Nirox Sculpture Park
This landscaped 15-hectare park, scattered with incredible contemporary sculptures, is a magical space for little ones to explore. Look out for special events like African storytelling on the line-up. The restaurant And then there was fire, serves up chips to delight the kids, as well as tapas-style dishes and Argentine grills. It's a hugely popular spot, however, so book in advance.Public spaces
Nothing like having some offspring to truly value the community spaces in our city. Despite Johannesburg’s declining infrastructure there are some real treats to discover.
Linden Swimming Pool
Stuck inside on a cold or rainy weekend with kids nagging on repeat? The heated Linden Swimming Pool is a great place to let out some energy. The facilities are excellent and the pool is open year-round. Grabbing an almond croissant from The Argentinean on your way there and devouring it on the stands, post-swim, would make it an even better idea.
The Wilds
While there are some wonderful public parks in Johannesburg, many with great playground equipment, The Wilds never fails to delight children and adults alike, thanks to artist James Delaney's laser-cut animal sculptures dotted throughout. There is a hike up to the viewpoint, manageable for young children who don't need prams, along with opportunities to spot the monkeys and owl sculptures or the late Andrew Lindsay's mosaics on the way up, or simply run on the grass and climb trees on Giraffe Lawn. It’s a really cool spot.Libraries
The libraries in Joburg remain some of the cities coolest spaces. With an array of books and free membership (you can register online here) it's always a great outing with kids. We love the Parkview Library on Tyrone Avenue for its excellent book selection and Paterson Park Library, just opposite the Norwood Police Station, for its beautiful public art.
The Johannesburg Family Cooperative
This Johannesburg initiative hosts some of the best events for young children with a cultural empowerment slant. From Afrocentric science fiction and robot-making at Breezeblock, to listening to African music at The Atelier at 44 Stanley, plus historic events like Femi Koya at Museum Africa, learning while having fun is central to the JFC. Become a member to support their growing work and check out their website for the next inspiring event.Listen
Mamas with Attitude
Can't leave the house yet because your baba is just too young? Get the low-down on parenting in Johannesburg by listening to this honest, insightful and funny podcast hosted by two of Jozi's coolest feminist mothers: Kathleen Ebersohn and Dee Marco. Once you have listened to all the episodes, sign up to Marco’s latest offering, her 40 Days Postpartum + newsletter, a series of daily reflections on her life as a mother of three.In no time these Johannesburg gems will have you feeling like your (not too) old cool self and school your sweet little offspring on how to be Jozi cool. Essential for living in this city.
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